Time

Time is absolutely astounding. Why is that minutes drag on and, yet, years seem to fly by faster than I can comprehend? For me, this year has completely changed my perceptions on time. A year ago right now I was finishing up my time as an undergrad at North Carolina State University, falling madly in love and getting ready to embark on my westward adventure to Eugene, Oregon. A year later, I find myself entering a state of liminality again. I am gathering my self, my thoughts, my shoes and all of my sunglasses and hitching a ride on the Westerlies blowing me on home to North Carolina.

I am at place in time where I feel it is necessary to evaluate this year. Perhaps it is all the evaluation material from Hillel International that is encouraging those thoughts, yet I'd rather write here and procrastinate than recount the programs and series I have coordinated (This is more fun, anyhow). And while a year has passed, one would think, surely, something has changed. Yes, I moved straight across the country. Yes, I began living all by myself, a venture I had yet to experience. But, after almost a year since graduation from NCSU, I feel I am right back where I started, maybe just a little wiser and worse for the wear.

I feel that a year ago I was open to every new opportunity I could get my hands on. Moreso, I was ready and willing to go where the wind blew me, sure of my ability to adapt and grow. Well, the wind blew pretty hard and at times I really felt more like a lost, little leaf rather than a purpose-filled seedling (sprout, grow, adapt...I like that metaphor). But there are a few things that I did learn and still learning. I am not quite sure the expanse of it all as of yet. I am, however, sure that in my years to come, lessons will reveal themselves and I will say, "Ah Ha! That is what that was all about!" and be grateful of my time here.

As time passes, I believe everyone gets the pang that it is neccessary to mark and measure time. But what is the appropriate measure for a year? Jonathan Larson might have suggested measuring, "In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee, in inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife, in 525,600 minutes."

My suggestion (for today) for measuring a year is in the seeds that one sows. It is the seeds of friendship, love and knowledge that one plants through the interactions you have in the year. With every person you come into contact with you are presented an opportunity to sow a seed.

As for the seeds I have sown, I don't think I can count that high.